Always Growing

I have learned that even when God shows me something, it doesn't always mean exactly that. It's interesting.  But I do think Jesus shows us things for us to grow in Him.

I keep hearing a song over and over. It comes to me many times in the day. It is I Can Only Imagine by Mercy Me.  Each time I hear it in my mind, it makes me feel warm and stronger.  I felt encouraged to keep praying for the prayer ministry of Grace Haven and so many families. I saw little kids who come who are confused and don't have understanding of who God is.

In my mind I keep seeing an image of myself playing a guitar. I know it doesn't make sense so I keep asking God to show me why am I playing the guitar? I think Jesus wants me to rest in worship so much. It's when I focus best and I feel certain. I really think I am supposed to keep praying.

For a season this year I was feeling so much pain and during that time I was tempted to stop worshipping and to stop listening to bible teaching.  It was almost like I wanted to hide from Him and zone out to TV shows. The shows weren't bad, but they were all about emotions and feelings, and not really telling me the truth about the healing God wants to do. It was like I got wrapped up in my own world and not seeing what God's doing. 

Sometimes I have to do what I don't feel like. Even if I try, God never leaves me alone and keeps reminding me to come back to him.  And the thing is, I am never sorry for turning back to God and listening!

The Message bible says this in Isaiah 14:24-27 and I like it so much.  It says:

God-of-the-Angel-Armies speaks:

“Exactly as I planned,
    it will happen.
Following my blueprints,
    it will take shape.
I will shatter the Assyrian who trespasses my land
    and stomp him into the dirt on my mountains.
I will ban his taking and making of slaves
    and lift the weight of oppression from all shoulders.”
This is the plan,
    planned for the whole earth,
And this is the hand that will do it,
    reaching into every nation.
God-of-the-Angel-Armies has planned it.
    Who could ever cancel such plans?
His is the hand that’s reached out.
    Who could brush it aside?

   I pray that whoever is reading this would know that whatever hard thing you are going through, when it is finished, you will understand.  Our hard things are for growing us even when we can't see it. I'm glad I'm not stuck in my TV zone anymore because I feel so much better when I am connecting to Jesus!

Yes You Can

Happy Spring to my friends and followers! I hope you are all doing well.  So much time has gone by since I have shared here.  My family has had a year of many surgeries and recoveries but I am happy to say that we see healing and we are doing the best we can with God's help.

Easter day was joyful in our home and I was feeling good too and spent most of the day up in my chair.  We were laughing and joking and being very silly as usual with my brothers and sisters.

But....then it happened. That night as I went to sleep with peace, I had a dream and not a good one!  I was back in Ukraine and the caregivers were saying to me, "Your family doesn't want you anymore. You aren't fun. Everyone talks bad about you! You have betrayed us by telling them about us.  You didn't tell the truth!" In the dream I was arguing back with them, but when I woke up my mind was no longer peaceful and happy as it had been just the day before!

As I woke up I also noticed I felt extra sore in all of my muscles and I couldn't see clearly. It was blurry and I wondered if I was going blind!  I felt a fight inside of me, as if everything is against me.

I began praying and asking God what's happening.  God told me to look up and find what's good.  I thought about it and realized we become blind when we stop looking at Jesus.  I just kept hearing to make my focus on him.  Even if I'm in pain, I know so many others are hurting too.  It's not just me.  It's pain we all feel at times.  After a short while I could see like normal again.


God kept speaking to my heart and I heard, "When Satan tells you no one cares about you, THAT is exactly how you can know I care about you."  Wow.  I just kept thinking about this and I began to realize that even when I can't know things - maybe I can. For example, I can feel the prayers of my friends even when they don't tell me they are praying. 

I just wanted so much to share this with those out there who feel like giving up right now because everything feels like a fight, like it's just too hard.  I want you to know I understand that feeling but even more, God knows what's going on with you right now.  I am praying for you to feel hope.

With God all things are possible.  
Matthew 19:26

Love is in the Light,

Lucia